You cannot hate yourself into taking better care of yourself.
One of the most important things I’ve learned about staying Carnivore has almost nothing to do with what’s on the plate: You cannot hate yourself into taking better care of yourself. If you’ve eaten something you wish you hadn’t, getting back on track with Carnivore doesn’t require punishment, a dramatic restart, or three days of telling yourself what a failure you are. You can learn from what happened and start again with the next meal.
My friend Linda is such a great example of this. She survived stage-three colon cancer, a colon resection, chemotherapy, surgical menopause, hypothyroidism, years of dieting, and plenty of frustration with her weight. She tried vegetarianism, veganism, fish, daily workouts, keto—you name it. Eventually she found Carnivore, lost another 35 pounds for a total loss of about 65 pounds, and at 62 years old, she weighs what she did in high school. But one of my favorite parts of Linda’s story isn’t the number on the scale. It’s what she learned to do when things don’t go perfectly.
Grace Is Not the Same Thing as a Free Pass
Linda talked about stressful situations, traveling, not being prepared, having a White Claw—or six White Claws!—and eating things she knew didn’t work well for her. In the past, that could lead straight into self-attack: Why did I do that? I feel terrible. The scale is going up. I’m such a dummy. Sound familiar?
One of the biggest things Linda said she learned through our group was how to extend herself grace. She realized, “I can just start now.” YES. But grace doesn’t mean, “Oh well! No big deal! Eat whatever you want!” It also doesn’t mean I need to swoop in as a coach and fuss at you because “that’s not Carnivore.” There’s another option: We can acknowledge what happened, look at what it actually did to us, and make the next decision from a place of caring about ourselves.
Learn From the Pain Instead of Creating More of It
Years ago, when I studied food-addiction recovery strategies, I learned how powerful shame, blame, guilt, and isolation can be. We mess up. We’re ashamed that we messed up. We don’t tell anybody. Now we’re alone with that shame, and we desperately want comfort. For many of us, food has historically been how we comforted ourselves. Hello, spiral.
Instead of piling MORE pain onto an already painful situation, I like to get curious about what actually happened. Not: Why were you so bad? But: How did that food make you feel? For me, eating foods that don’t work for my body can mean waking up with squinty, puffy eyes. I feel inflamed. I’m stiff. I’m tired. I don’t want to go to the gym. THAT matters to me. I don’t need lightning to strike because I ate something off-plan. I can notice the consequence and decide, “I don’t want to feel like that.”
Linda described her body as almost like a canary in the coal mine. When she goes away from what works for her, she notices it quickly. That information is useful. We don’t need to turn it into a character judgment. Focus on the wins, but learn from the pain. Then eat the meat at the next meal.
Stop Trying to Fuss Yourself Into Obedience
Linda and I both grew up during an era when dieting could get pretty ridiculous. She remembers eating about 300 calories a day as a teenager and doing 200 sit-ups. I remember trying to squeeze into prom dresses by surviving on a Carnation Instant Breakfast and one Lean Cuisine. Apparently there was some secret manual circulating among teenage girls in the ’80s, because WHAT WERE WE DOING?!
Underneath those behaviors was a belief many of us carried for decades: If I’m hard enough on myself, maybe I’ll finally behave. We think we can fuss ourselves, punish ourselves, restrict ourselves, and shame ourselves into obedience. But nothing else in life gets better because we hate on it. Why would that work for us?
Linda’s approach now looks very different. Carnivore is the foundation, but she has also built habits that help her feel good—morning light, walking, red light, rebounding, and more movement throughout the day. After walking the Camino de Santiago with her husband, where some days approached 20 miles, she decided she wanted to increase her daily steps so she could go back even stronger. She isn’t punishing her body into submission. She’s taking care of it.
Just Start With the Next Meal
You don’t need to wait until Monday. You don’t need one final weekend of junk. You don’t need to punish yourself with fasting because you ate something you regret, and you certainly don’t need to spend the next three days obsessing over what you did. You can notice what happened, remember how those foods made your body feel, and because you care about yourself enough to want something better, start again with the next meal.
Eat the meat. Take the walk. Get outside. Do the next helpful thing. That may not feel as dramatic as declaring that you’re starting your whole life over tomorrow morning, but those little decisions are how we actually move forward.
And… think about joining a group! See below.
Stop doing carnivore alone.
My Zero Carb Life coaching gives you more than a plan—it gives you a tribe of people who get it. Together, we tackle cravings, troubleshoot real-life challenges, build accountability, and learn from carnivores who’ve already walked this road. If you’re ready to spend less time obsessing over food and more time enjoying the freedom you’re working toward, come join us.
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Tags: Carnivore Diet, Carnivore Mindset, Food Addiction, Carnivore Coaching, My Zero Carb Life
